Dawnovon, my sweetie? by FlavorOfWords, literature
Literature
Dawnovon, my sweetie?
She -
Is so much more,
Much much more,
than I could have ever known.
So gentle and sweet,
And she's the most interesting to meet.
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She's got me wanting to ask,
if she's blind or just mad.
To have any interest in me.
When all I do is sit - and retreat.
Into a self-made hole.
On guard - no loss - of control.
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Questioning -
If it will be like the last time.
When I put everything on the line,
moving out there to be closer to 'you'.
My love meant nothing -
Who knew?
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I feel I can trust her
Tonight
I write
Why
Why not
Because I'm tired
Of not feeling alive
Each word
Is a breath
It's been so long
That I've held it back
Almost numb
Yet pushing forward
Swimming
In this current
Drowning
In tomorrow
But today
Tonight
I force my breath
To feel alive
To remember
How
And even why
I write
Patience.
Stay positive.
Never hint,
At all of the distress.
You know it's for nothing.
You know it's simply meaningless.
In the end,
Everything will be as it is.
As it should.
Out of your hands.
Every thought I speak,
Meets rebuttal.
Every idea I have,
Is flawed and invites disapproval.
Every move I make,
Leaves me open to defeat.
And you wonder why,
I have this stoned look on my face.
Why I refuse to speak.
Just a subtle laugh and smile.
No - I'm not high,
But it would complement this existence I've come to know.
Too bad - you know it's for those who don't.
I listen
Simply
There is not a moment of my life
I have not wondered into
Stumbled upon
Control
This isn't something I hold
Your words
They define
Who I am
Who I should
What I should
Be
Do
Say
Breathe
Yes
Breathe
This is what I'll do
As you speak
Meaningless
Words
Words of nonsense
Words of defiance
Words of inspiration
Yes
Complements
Is there anything else I should say
Is there anything else
I could do
To uncomplicate
Each moment
I'm nice
You're nice
This is the meaning
Isn't it
I must not forget
To help
You
Because I'm reminded
We live in your world
Not mine
Mine would be too quiet
In mine
I wouldn't have to doodle
To make you feel
Like
How
Can I
Make you
Feel?
Like
You're not
Colored in
Grey?
Would it be
Or could it be
The shift
In my gaze
As your left
Stares
Into
My right?
Is there
Anyone
Who sees
The wonder
And danger
In every word?
Who
To trust?
Honestly
I am
Not
without
Breaks
Or fangs
Somehow
I still
Walk
And hunger
I still
Hope
Something
Eventually
Will
Come
Or go
Just right
I've always
Enjoyed
What's left
Almost like
The shaded
Snow
Or the lasting
light
Of the
Burnt out
Out of reach
Sky